Iberico at PP

So what’s your half-time routine? Do you queue at the Penalty Spot café for the chips lottery? Or do you wait patiently at Terry’s gaff for a tea? Maybe you forsake the last 5 minutes of the half to get that half-time quencher in at Strikers? All wise choices but I say we should go Spanish in our approach to food & drink at Penydarren Park.

I’m not sure if it’s a trend across the Iberian peninsular but the Basques in particular take their own food & drink with them to the stadium, be it Bilbao or San Sebastian. I think we should follow suit, it may not be a sheepskin full of Rioja or a choirizo baguette in our duffle bag but why not a bottle of Rhymney Dark or hipflask of Penderyn whiskey to ward off the dark spirits on a wet Tuesday at home to Corby? As for food, what’s the issue? I’d recommend a full Swansea Road picnic. Pasties, pies, crisps, sausage on sticks, just the basics. Instead of that queue or that trudge to Strikers, we should be sitting in discussion groups on the Wank Bank, passing around the bottle of red wine and the Y Fenni cheese platter whilst discussing the performance of the Bristol referee or why Danny Carter still looks fitter than half the team.

The end result of this motivation of self-service trend would surely be for the Club to save money on personnel and stock by closing all the tea bars and Strikers, no more worries about licensing hours and wedding bookings instead Penydarren Park would become the pic-nic capital of the Valleys. Each lunchtime the pitch would be filled with the happy workers from T-Mobile and the Assembly Government all tucking into their Brie & Grape sandwiches whilst raising a glass of Merlot to the past glories of Merthyr Tydfil FC. A new bohemian outlook for the people of Merthyr would surely develop, resulting in the end of party politics in the borough (just think no more Tony Chaplin letters in the Express) and a period of enlightenment for all its citizens.

All it takes is a couple of ham sandwiches and a bottle of Dandelion & Burdock – think about it!
Chairman Mao

Comments

Chairman Mao said…
The deckchair is ordered. The gingham sheet is folded. Another season is about to start. Hurrah for the artisans who have laboured to ensure the picnic area is ready, I'll raise a glass in your honour on Saturday. Pimms anyone?
Suntan Sammy said…
What the fuck are you on about you Stoney Road yuppie?
Chairman Mao said…
The Colin the Monk Stand comes straight in at Number One in the Picnic venue top ten list. Will it stay for there for the next home game? Or will the Pontmorlais End tempt the bon viveurs out onto the verdant pastures?
Suntan Sammy said…
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